Wear a disguise in public.

"I'm not sure why you're trying to get a second cup of free water sir, but the disguise is unnecessary. Because the water, like I just mentioned, is free and all."Why wear a disguise in public? Why NOT wear a disguise in public? Think about how you'd react if you saw someone wearing a fake Burt Reynolds 'stache with a weird dreadlock wig and some Super Mario suspenders. Would it be the highlight of your day? I guess that depends on how shitty your day was, but it at least has potential to be the first thing you tell to someone else when they ask you about your day:

"I was just walking down the street, minding my biz, and all of the sudden I glance left to see Super Burt Marley shakin' his junk, sarbling all up and down the street! And I think he was eating some old mac n' cheese with his bare hands. It was weird." (see last post for made up definition of "sarble")

Something tells me you have an eye-patch in your bedroom. Not sure why. But I think you do. Wear it tomorrow. Wear it with some overalls and a Raggedy Andy red wig. I see good things in your future.*

*good things may or may not include a day full of people pointing and/or laughing at your expense

Oh, and don't duct-tape your fucking face. Why, Sweet Sassy Molassey, WHY would you ever think this is a good idea?


So in recapping, once again:
-Wear a diguise.
-Don't duct-tape your fucking face.

Good day everyone.